Krystaltale
by RedQueenMiku
Summary: Sans has never been one to make much of a fuss over anything, but, when another skeleton named Lucida enters the picture and invites Frisk and friends to stay in her Zyzzyva Boarding House, Sans can feel that there's something not quite right about her. What he finds out about her, though, ends up throwing him into much more trouble than he ever bargained for.
1. Welcome to the Zyzzyva Station!

"I can't believe we're doing this," Undyne groaned, following behind Sans and Papyrus.

"IT'S NOT THAT HUMILIATING, REALLY," Papyrus said, "WE JUST HAVE TO FIND A PLACE TO LIVE NOW THAT WE LEFT ALL OUR HOMES BEHIND IN THE UNDERGROUND."

"you sure you're okay coming with us, kid?" Sans asked Frisk, who was walking behind him. Frisk nodded silently in agreement.

"I am so glad you have decided to stay with us, my child," Toriel chimed in with a smile, patting Frisk on the head. Frisk smiled back.

"According to my phone's GPS, there's a boarding house not too far from here," Alphys said, holding her phone out so the others could see.

"how's the rating?" Sans asked. Alphys' claws clicked against the phone's touchscreen for a moment before she glanced up at Sans again.

"There are no ratings yet," Alphys replied nervously, "Apparently, it's a brand-new place."

"THEN THEY SHOULD HAVE SOME SPACE FOR SOME NEW FRIENDS!" Papyrus piped up, running ahead of the group.

"Hold on!" Alphys called out, running after Papyrus, "You don't even know where it is!"

"that's my bro for ya," Sans said with a chuckle, "always ready to make a few new friends."

Frisk enthusiastically chased after Alphys and Sans, holding their arms out like an airplane. Sans and Toriel both shared a laugh of amusement.

"that kid's really got some energy, huh, tori?" Sans said, gently nudging Toriel.

"They're enthusiastic too," Toriel added, "and such a good child."

"even when they start flirting with you?" Sans inquired, his grin widening. Toriel laughed awkwardly, deciding not to reply.

"That kid flirts with everyone," Undyne butted in, "It's like it's their first reaction when meeting someone new or something."

"AH-HA! HERE IT IS!" Papyrus shouted from around the corner. The three stragglers eventually caught up and saw a large, blindingly colorful building situated at the end of the road. There was a large banner reading "Grand Opening" being hung on the front of the building by a small skeleton girl, who was precariously perched on top of a ladder. Papyrus, Frisk, and Alphys had already reached the building

"HELLO, NEW FRIEND!" Papyrus shouted up to the skeleton girl. The girl whipped her head around to see Papyrus and almost fell off of the ladder in surprise.

"H-holy pineapples!" the skeleton girl stuttered in shock, "Is that Frisk?!"

Frisk waved to the skeleton girl, who quickly descended the ladder to meet her new guests. Sans, Toriel, and Undyne joined them very shortly after. The skeleton girl looked like she was going to faint right then and there, but quickly regained her composure.

"W-welcome to the brand new Zyzzyva Monster Boarding House!" the skeleton girl said with a flourish toward the building, "This is the best—and newest—boarding house in all the world! My name is Lucida and I run the place."

"hey, lucida," Sans replied with a wave.

"He said my name!" Lucida swooned. Everyone stared back at Lucida in awkward bewilderment.

"DO YOU MIND GIVING US A TOUR OF THE PLACE?" Papyrus asked.

"Oh my pineapples!" Lucida squealed with joy before clearing her throat and putting on an air of professionalism, "One tour, coming right up."

Lucida then led her guests into the building. The outside of the building was decorated in garish shades of blue, hot pink, lavender, and lime green, but the lobby was much more conservative on the color usage, having white walls and being decorated with all manner of floral arrangements. There were red-cushioned benches against the walls and a small, round, wooden table in the center of the room bearing only a vase of colorful flowers. The room itself was huge with a vaulted ceiling and a glass-walled balcony about a floor up. Multiple hallways branched out from the room, likely leading to the living areas, and there was a reception counter to one side of the room.

"This place, you'll agree, is truly a marvel," Lucida explained, "There are cafes in the food court on the fifth floor, loads of surprises everywhere you look, and free Wi-Fi."

"YES! WI-FI!" Papyrus exclaimed happily. The others stared at him in confusion.

"Moving on," Lucida said after a moment, "there's so much to see here! Come on, everybody!"

With that, Lucida was off like a shot, racing down one of the hallways. The others tried to keep up, but they eventually lost her.

"Where do you think she went?" Toriel asked, out of breath.

"Hey, Lucida!" Undyne shouted suddenly, startling the others, "Where are you?!"

"Hello, everyone!"

Undyne whirled around to find Lucida standing just behind her. With a gasp of surprise, she reeled back, stumbling into Sans and sending them both to the floor.

"Hiya, Undyne!" Lucida giggled, "Hey, do you like bacon?"

Undyne snarled in anger, pushing herself back to her feet as Papyrus helped up his brother.

"well," Sans said, his expression unreadable, "this is going to be quite the day, isn't it?"

Finally, the tour was over. After six floors of the best Lucida could throw their way, which was quite a lot, to be honest, the five intrepid monsters and their human companion were completely exhausted. The place was filled with all manner of random nonsense, but Lucida introduced it all as if it were commonplace.

"Well, that's it!" Lucida said once they were back in the lobby, "I'll give you guys a little time to decide whether or not you want to stay."

With that, Lucida skipped away to another part of the building.

"Well?" Undyne began hesitantly, which was unusual for her, "What do you guys think?"

"I-I'm fine with anything you decide, Undyne!" Alphys stuttered excitedly, grabbing Undyne's arm and hugging it tightly. Undyne stared bewilderedly at Alphys for a moment before giving in and placing her free hand on Alphys' head, causing the lizard monster to blush profusely.

"It doesn't really matter to me, so much as we can all be together," Toriel said, petting Frisk's head. Frisk nodded silently in agreement.

"I CAN'T PASS UP FREE WI-FI!" Papyrus added enthusiastically, warranting another round of strange looks from the others.

"there's something about lucida," Sans mused aloud, "i can't put my finger on it, but there's something weird about her."

"Like the fact that she's completely insane?!" Undyne butted in.

"there's something more than that," Sans replied, "of course, that's just me. she could really just be a bone-ly little skeleton begging tibia-ppreciated."

"SANS!" Papyrus shouted angrily, "NOW IS HARDLY THE TIME TO BE MAKING TERRIBLE PUNS!"

"i'd like to keep an eye socket on her, though," Sans continued, his pupils fading out, "i have a feeling there's more to this place than meets the eye."

Frisk made her way over to Sans and placed their hand on his shoulder. Sans' pupils returned and his expression softened as he ruffled Frisk's hair with his hand.

"Does that mean we're staying?" Alphys asked.

"OF COURSE IT DOES!" Papyrus answered triumphantly, pumping his fist in the air.

"Fine," Undyne said, sneering, "but when we're all buried in smoking ruin, don't cry about it to me."

"Cry about what?"

Undyne whirled around to see that Lucida had snuck up on her once again. This time, when she reeled back, she stumbled on her own accord, dragging Alphys down to the floor with her.

"I'm glad to hear that you've decided to stay!" Lucida cheered, ignoring the fact that Undyne and Alphys were now lying in a heap on the floor, "We're going to have so much fun here!"

* * *

Undyne stretched her arms out, sitting up in bed. She'd gotten a better night's sleep than she thought she'd get. At least the accommodations in this crazy place were decent. Her room was painted dark blue with blue carpeting and the furniture was all painted red. It was like the room was made for her.

Vaulting herself out of bed, Undyne pulled open one of her dresser drawers and pulled out a pair of clothes. She figured she'd try to find out where she could get a shower here. Upon opening the door, though, she found Lucida standing directly in the doorway with a creepy smile on her face. Undyne lunged backward, just barely resisting the urge to summon a wave of energy spears.

"Good morning, Undyne!" Lucida said. She was much too cheery for Undyne's tastes.

"Would you quit sneaking up on me like that?!" Undyne snapped, "It's not funny! It's just creepy!"

Lucida didn't reply, but started laughing instead. Undyne glared at Lucida furiously, her upper lip beginning to twitch. Just then, she noticed something...off. Lucida was laughing at her own joke, but Undyne could have sworn she saw a flash of regret on Lucida's face.

Regaining her composure, Undyne shoved Lucida out of the way to exit the room. Halfway down the hall, though, a sudden, ear-piercing buzz caused Undyne to drop what she was holding in surprise.

"IT'S A FIRE!" Papyrus screamed, bursting out of his room, "RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!"

"That's not a fire alarm, Papyrus," Lucida said, having followed Undyne down the hall, "That buzzer just tells me when someone is waiting for me in the lobby."

The buzzer, started up again. This time, it didn't stop, making one continuous buzz.

"Well, someone's sure impatient," Undyne sneered.

"Is something happening out here?" Toriel said, peering out of her bedroom door. A sleepy Frisk appeared with her, rubbing their eyes.

"I'll explain on the way downstairs," Lucida said, starting forward, "Come on!"

* * *

It wasn't long before all the boarders, including Alphys and Sans, who were particularly hard to wake up, were downstairs in the lobby gawking at who they saw standing at the counter.

"Welcome to the Zyzzyva Monster Boarding House, the newest, greatest boarding house ever!" Lucida said to her new guests, stepping behind the reception counter, "What can I do you for?"

"Give us lodgings! Now!"

"A-pup-pup," Lucida replied, waving her finger discouragingly, "How do you say that?"

"Hmph. Please?"

Sans glanced over at Frisk, who was hiding behind Toriel. They had every reason to. Standing at the counter were Chara and Flowey, the latter being the one that had just spoken. What they were doing here, Sans had no idea, but they were one-hundred percent pure evil. Sans knew exactly what they'd done and he despised them for it.

"All righty, then!" Lucida cheered, seemingly oblivious to the reputation of her new guests, "I'll get you all set up. By the way, I'm Lucida, owner of the Zyzzyva Station."

Sans froze. He could have sworn he felt something pulse within him. He couldn't pinpoint what the feeling was, but it was certainly more ominous than he would have liked it to be. He couldn't wait to confirm his suspicions about Lucida and get himself and his friends out of this place.

"If you have any questions, please, don't hesitate to ask me," Lucida continued, "Unless I'm busy, of course."

"I have a question," Chara piped up, "What are THEY doing here?"

Chara immediately whirled around to face the other beings in the room, their menacing, crimson eyes seeming to glow as they stared them down. Flowey, on the other hand, seemed completely flabbergasted, staring at the others with a shocked expression. That's not what Sans was worried about, though. While the others focused on Chara and Flowey's unexplained appearances at the Zyzzyva House, Sans was more focused on Lucida, who opened her mouth to say something, but quickly shut it again, looking crestfallen. There was no reason for it, which made Sans all the more suspicious.

There was a long, awkward moment of silence as Chara stared down Frisk and the other monsters. Then, Chara glanced back at Lucida, expecting a response. Lucida jumped in surprise, looking like she was trying to remember something she couldn't quite put her finger on.

"O-oh, right," Lucida finally stuttered, "They're here 'cuz they live here too, just like you do now."

"You mean we have to live in the same place as them?!" Flowey exclaimed, butting back into the conversation.

"You mean your arch-nemesises?" Lucida asked. Sans noticed her twitch a bit, if only for a second. Something was wrong.

"Wouldn't that be nemesii?" Alphys pointed out, "No, wait..."

"Maybe neme...me...nem...neme...Nope, I got nothing."

Lucida had completely relaxed upon finishing that last statement. Sans was bewildered.

"Argh!" Flowey shouted, "All I'm trying to say is that I refuse to live in the same building as these idiots!"

"hey," Sans said with a shrug, "it's no picnic for us either, but we've all got to deal with it."

Why did he say that? He knew he could have just told Flowey and Chara to leave, but he didn't.

"Fine," Flowey scoffed, "Doesn't mean I have to like it, though."

"Yay! Problem solved!" Lucida cheered, "Let's go upstairs and I'll show you your rooms!"

With that, Lucida took Chara's free hand began dragging the two psychopaths across the room toward one of the hallways. That's when she seemed to take notice of Flowey's unwilling expression.

"I know exactly what you need, Flowey," Lucida said with a smile.

"What's that?" Flowey replied curiously.

"Bacon."

Flowey's face scrunched up in confusion as he stared back at Lucida.

"Just roll with it," Undyne piped up.

That was when Lucida, Chara, and Flowey left. Shortly after, Sans began to walk away as well.

"WHERE ARE YOU GOING, SANS?" Papyrus asked, following after him.

"nowhere important," Sans replied, walking faster. He glanced back to see if anyone else was following him. Thankfully, it was just Papyrus.

"ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT CHARA AND FLOWEY?" Papyrus inquired, "DON'T WORRY. I'M SURE WE CAN MAKE FRIENDS WITH THEM TOO!"

"that's not what i'm worried about, pap," Sans responded. If Chara had held themselves back from going genocidal in the lobby, Sans had enough faith in them to assume they wouldn't be attacking any time soon. Sure, Sans would keep watch for them, but that wasn't his main concern at the moment.

"WHAT'S WRONG, THEN?"

"nothing's wrong. i'm just going for a walk, is all."

Papyrus was quiet for a moment.

"ALL RIGHT," Papyrus finally replied, "THAT'S FINE."

Sans kept walking for a little while longer. When he looked back again, he found that Papyrus was now gone. He sighed.

"sorry, pap. i'd love to tell ya what i think is going on, but i just can't. not yet, anyway."


	2. Broken Knuckles

Sans sighed, leaning against Papyrus and looking out over the room. Everyone had decided to congregate in the living room that day and it was kind of peaceful. Since the day of his and his friends' arrival about a month ago, many more had come to the Zyzzyva House. Besides Flowey and Chara, the house now held Asgore, Mettaton, Napstablook, Shyren, Grillby, the Monster Kid from Snowdin, and Muffet with her spider clans. It was quite the crowd, but Sans still had to wonder why some of them came here.

Lucida hadn't done much since those first couple days either besides manage the house and try to make friends with her boarders. It was a bit relieving. Maybe Sans didn't have much to worry about after all.

Sans stared at everyone in the room, taking in the peaceful scene. Papyrus was playing a video game on a human game system known as a "3DS". Alphys, Undyne, and Asgore were watching anime on Alphys' phone, Asgore occasionally grimacing at about the same time Undyne would start to laugh. Mettaton, Napstablook, and Shyren were discussing something for their television program while Mettaton was plugged into the wall to charge. Frisk, Toriel, the Monster Kid, and Flowey were playing Trivial Pursuit, which Toriel praised as being "highly educational". Muffet was louging sideways in an armchair reading a book entitled "1001 Ways to Make Easy Money", her slender legs swinging in time to the noises from Alphys' anime. As for Chara, they were meditating on the other side of the room with Grillby.

"Hey, Papyrus!"

Both Sans and Papyrus jumped, Papyrus almost dropping the 3DS in his hands. Lucida had snuck up behind them and had yelled hello from just over Papyrus' shoulder, startling both of the skeletons. Papyrus scrambled to get back into the rhythm of his game again, concentrating intensely on the screen in front of him.

"What'cha playing?" Lucida asked, straining to look at the game.

"YOU'RE GOING DOWN, YOU OVERGROWN LIZARD!" Papyrus suddenly screamed.

"Huh?" Alphys piped up from across the room.

"SORRY," Papyrus apologized, "I WASN'T TALKING ABOUT YOU, ALPHYS. I'M FIGHTING BOWSER!"

"Again?" Lucida asked confusedly.

"yep," Sans answered in Papyrus' stead, "he's going for a perfect game this time."

"He's been playing New Super Mario Bros. for weeks!" Lucida exclaimed.

"I'M JUST ABOUT TO BEAT IT!" Papyrus chimed in with a grin.

"For the fifth time!" Lucida retorted, throwing her hands in the air. Sans chuckled. Papyrus had been playing the game for a long time now and was currently trying to beat the game without losing a single life. He'd made a commendable effort for sure, but Bowser was the one thing keeping him from achieving that goal.

"DARN IT!" Papyrus shouted, "I DIED AGAIN! CURSE YOU, BOWSER!

"You see?" Chara butted in from across the room, "This is why I'm the one that always wins."

"oh?" Sans replied, his left eye burning bright blue, "i'll bet you couldn't get through the game without losing a life."

"I already have," Chara responded, "On my first try, even."

"NO WAY!" Papyrus exclaimed in amazement, "WOWEE!"

Chara winked in reply, a wide grin on their face. Sans felt his entire body tense up. He knew he shouldn't be worried about Chara right now, but they still managed to rub him the wrong way.

"Chara," Grillby said, staring straight at Chara. Chara huffed and closed their eyes, going back to meditating with Grillby.

"What are you two doing?" Lucida asked them.

"Anger-management class," Chara answered bitterly.

"You teach an anger management class?" Lucida exclaimed, completely bewildered.

"No," Grillby said, "I do."

"Oh," Lucida replied sheepishly, "That makes a lot more sense."

Sans turned his attention to the board game that Frisk, Toriel, the Monster Kid, and Flowey were playing. He saw Toriel draw a card before reading it off to Flowey.

"What is the deadliest freshwater fish in the world?" Toriel read, her face scrunching up in disgust.

"That's easy!" Undyne butted in, "It's me, of course!"

"No way," Chara piped up, "I could beat you easily."

"You're not a fish!" Undyne shouted angrily.

"Both of you are wrong!" Flowey interrupted, seeming ticked off.

"The answer on the card says 'piranha'," Toriel said, holding out the card to Undyne. Undyne snatched the card from Toriel's hand and read it over, her eyebrows furrowing in displeasure.

"They don't know what they're talking about," Undyne scoffed, tossing the card back over her shoulder, "I could beat a piranha in a fight any day."

"I could beat the piranha and you," Chara said, their eyes glowing red. Sans tensed up again.

"Keep dreaming, freak," Undyne growled.

"DARN IT!" Papyrus shouted, shaking his 3DS in the air in rage, "I JUST CAN'T DO IT! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!"

"Want me to answer that?" Chara asked eagerly. Grillby then cleared his throat loudly and deliberately, snapping Chara back into focus, reluctant as they were to do so.

Sans stared back at the Trivial Pursuit game just in time to notice Monster Kid place one of the tiny plastic wedges into their game piece.

"Jenga!" Monster Kid shouted triumphantly, "I win!"

"That's not how you play Jenga," Lucida said, leaping over both the couch and Sans to land next to Monster Kid, "You gotta stack 'em first!"

Sans watched in bewilderment as Lucida began skillfully stacking the tiny wedges until the tower was about half her height.

"Then you take one out," Lucida continued. She then bent down and pulled the bottom wedge out of the stack, causing the entire tower to topple over in a shower of Trivial Pursuit wedges.

"Jenga!" both Lucida and Monster Kid yelled simultaneously. Frisk began clapping while Toriel placed a hand against her head in exasperation.

"Can you be a bit quieter over there?" Grillby asked politely, "Chara and I are trying to focus."

"Focus on what?" Muffet chimed in, finally looking up from her book, "You're just sitting there."

"We're meditating," Chara retorted, "Now shut up. We're in the zone."

"Feh," Muffet scoffed, twirling one of her hands around in the air dismissively, "Who needs all of that freaky spiritual stuff anyway?"

"It's not 'freaky'," Grillby responded, "It's relaxing."

"Whatever," Muffet said, turning back to her book, "Say what you want."

Sans scanned over the room again. This time, he noticed that Asgore had left the room and Alphys and Undyne were now watching anime by themselves. Lucida seemed to notice too, as she quickly raced out of the room. Sans' pupils disappeared as he watched her leave, staring in the direction she left from with his chilling, blank gaze. She was up to something and Sans knew it.

"THEY MADE THIS GAME ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE!" Papyrus moaned, causing Sans to focus his attention back on what his brother was doing, "HOW DO THEY EXPECT ANYONE TO BE ABLE TO DO THIS?"

"It's just a game, is it not?" Toriel asked, trying to get the Trivial Pursuit game back on track and stop Frisk and Monster Kid from stacking the wedges like Lucida had earlier.

"YES," Papyrus replied hesitantly, "BUT IT'S A VERY IMPORTANT GAME."

"don't worry, bro," sans said, nudging his brother's arm, "i know you can do it."

"YES!" Papyrus shouted, a glimmer of determination in his eye, "I CAN DO IT! I CAN DO WHAT NO SKELETON HAS EVER DONE BEFORE! I CAN BEAT THIS GAME WITHOUT LOSING A SINGLE LIFE AND DO IT WITH STYLE! THAT'S THE PAPYRUS WAY!"

"atta bro," Sans replied with a smile. His gaze then turned back to where Lucida had left from. After a moment, he decided that what the female skeleton was doing probably wasn't anything important.

 _"it's not like she's gonna destroy the world, right?"_ Sans thought to himself, leaning back against his brother. He chuckled silently at his own ridiculous thought. From what he'd seen out of Lucida thus far, he was beginning to doubt that there was anything suspicious about her at all.

* * *

Sans was violently jostled awake as he was thrown across the couch. He figured he'd fallen asleep on Papyrus' shoulder. Now, Papyrus was throwing a tantrum, likely over events in his game. Sans chuckled. It was so incredibly typical of Papyrus. In fact, this was far from the first time Sans had been woken up this way.

Sans quickly scanned the room over again. Everyone was still doing the same things they were before Sans had fallen asleep, so he surmised that he hadn't been asleep for that long.

"Guys! It's an emergency!"

Everyone's attention quickly turned to Lucida, who had just raced into the room.

"What's wrong?" Toriel asked, standing in preparation to take action if needed. Sans noticed some of the others tense up too.

"Asgore is gone!"

The room went completely silent. Some stared at Lucida in confusion while others, like Toriel, brushed Lucida off and went back to what they were doing.

"Wh-what?" Lucida stuttered bewilderedly, "Aren't you guys worried?!"

"He probably just went out to do king stuff," Mettaton piped up from across the room, "He is the king of all monsters, you know."

"If he did leave, then he can stay gone," Toriel huffed bitterly.

Lucida looked like she was going to have a nervous breakdown. Sans stared at her intently.

"I-I," Lucida stuttered, desperately racking her brain for something to say, "I-I f-found a note."

Now everyone's attention snapped back to Lucida.

"What did it say?" Alphys asked nervously.

"I-it said that h-he was...g-getting tired of being king, s-so he was going to leave everyone forever."

Sans sat up rigidly, his left eye flaring up. Glancing around the room, he saw the others chattering nervously amongst themselves and trying to make plans to find him. Sans then looked back at Lucida, who was fearfully wringing her hands. Sans knew she'd just made up a bold-faced lie, but the others didn't seem to realize that. They had no reason to suspect her at all. Only Sans knew what would make someone act the way Lucida was acting.

"Just leave this one to the Spider Detective Agency!" Muffet piped up with a flourish as a crowd of spiders emerged to join her, "We'll take the job for the low, low price of free!"

"What Spider Detec-"

"Really?!" Lucida cried joyously, interrupting Chara's question, "You'd do that?!"

"Free, plus a 15% sales tax," Muffet added, a mischievous grin on her face.

"Deal," Lucida replied, "I'm holding you to that though, Muffet."

"You can count on us! Ahuhuhu~!" Muffet giggled.

"Yay!" Lucida cheered, "Thanks Muffet!"

Now Lucida was completely relaxed again. There was no doubt in Sans' mind at that point. There was definitely something she was trying to accomplish with all of this. All he had left to figure out was what that something was.

"Um, Muffet?" Alphys mumbled.

"Yes, Doctor Alphys?" Muffet responded, turning toward the scientist.

"15% of free is still free, you know," Alphys pointed out. Muffet's eyes widened in shock, the corners of her now-faltering grin beginning to twitch. Sans wasn't sure whether it was momentary relapse or something greater that caused Muffet to forget that fact, but she was sure remembering it now.

"Ha!" Chara laughed, "You got tricked with your own trick!"

"Shut up!" Muffet shouted, her cheeks growing flush.

"What are you guys waiting for?" Lucida chimed in, "Let's get going!"

"Well," Muffet said, regaining her composure, "Luckily for you, I know exactly where to go first! Ahuhu~!"

* * *

Sans suddenly found himself alone in the middle of a bustling city with Lucida. Everything had happened so quickly he barely had time to register it all, but he went back over what he knew in his head. Muffet had somehow been able to drag Lucida, Sans, Papyrus, Chara, Flowey, Alphys, and Undyne to Las Vegas. Toriel had been adamant about staying out of the search for Asgore and kept Frisk behind with her, Mettaton and his entourage had stayed behind for their television schedule, and Grillby and Monster Kid stayed behind for their own reasons.

Upon getting to Las Vegas, Lucida had gotten angry at Muffet for dragging them there before Muffet, Chara, and Flowey ran off to go try to gamble. Directly after that, Alphys thought she spotted a "real-life anime character", so she and Undyne raced off to go find them, and Papyrus ran off because he thought he spotted a video game store. Before Sans could follow after Papyrus, he was pushed back by the crowd and lost sight of his brother. Now he was alone with Lucida, to his own dismay.

"Aw, come on!" Lucida shouted in exasperation, "We're supposed to be searching for Asgore!"

Sans stared at Lucida for a while trying to gauge what she was feeling. He couldn't figure out exactly what she was mad at, if she was even mad at all. In fact, a small part of her almost seemed happy that all of this was happening. He'd watched her when Muffet, Chara, and Flowey left and he could have sworn she'd smiled just a bit.

"O-okay," Lucida stuttered, beginning to pace in circles, "A-at least I'm not alone. Sans is still here. Y-you're with me, aren't you, Sans?"

Sans tensed up, only barely able to keep his pupils from fading out. Lucida was speaking like an actress trying to talk off-script. It was almost disturbing.

"sure," Sans replied hesitantly.

"Okay," Lucida said, exhaling deeply and relaxing, "First, we need to find a Krispy Kreme."

"huh?" Sans grunted confusedly. Lucida's fear had vanished instantly once he gave in to her demands. It was only more proof that there was something wrong here.

"Trust me on this one," Lucida replied, grabbing Sans' hand and dragging him through the crowd. Sans contemplated pulling away, but he decided to go along with Lucida just to see what would come of it, his curiosity getting the best of him.

"Here," Lucida said, handing Sans a box of donuts. Sans lifted the top of the box open in curiosity to find a dozen lemon creme donuts sitting inside. Lucida held another box presumably filled with the same contents as Sans'.

"what are these for?" Sans asked bewilderedly. If he weren't so suspicious of Lucida, he could probably feel comfortable saying one of the hundreds of donut puns flying through his mind right now.

"We're going to find Asgore using these!" Lucida replied enthusiastically, "We'll just hold them up in the air and call out for him and he should come straight to us!"

"what?" Sans responded incredulously. There was absolutely no logic behind this plan whatsoever and Sans had to wonder if the plan was made for some other purpose entirely.

"Asgore likes these, doesn't he?" Lucida asked sheepishly.

"not as far as i know," Sans answered, "but who knows? maybe asgore could be a big sucker for these things. tori'd know this kind of thing better than us."

"Well, it's worth a shot!" Lucida said, grabbing a donut and thrusting it into the air. Sans plucked a donut out of his box and did the same. He was curious to see where exactly Lucida was going with this.

"Hey, Asgore!" Lucida shouted, "We have lemon creme donuts!"

"LUCIDA? IS THAT YOU?"

Sans knew that voice anywhere.

"hey, pap!" Sans called out, "we're over here!"

After a moment, Papyrus emerged from the crowd. Sans sighed in relief. At least he knew Papyrus was okay.

"where'd you go, anyway?" Sans asked.

"I WENT TO THE GAME STORE AND GOT A NEW GAME!" Papyrus answered enthusiastically, "LOOK! I HAVE TO FIGHT AN EVIL DUCK WITH A HAMMER!"

"He's playing Kirby?" Lucida inquired.

"he's playing kirby," Sans replied.

"Well, Papyrus," Lucida continued, "Sans and I have been searching for Asgore. Here!"

Lucida threw her donut box on top of Sans' and dug around for another donut, handing it off to Papyrus.

"WHAT IS THIS FOR?" Papyrus asked, eyeing the donut curiously.

"It's to lure him in," Lucida said, "Now hold it up."

"Hey, donuts!"

Sans whirled around to see a human man making his way toward the skeleton trio.

"Not for you!" Lucida shouted, stepping inbetween the man and Sans. The man pouted defeatedly, getting ready to leave.

"Hold up!" Lucida called to the man, "Have you seen a really big white goat man anywhere?"

"What?" the man grunted in reply, completely bewildered.

"Never mind. Here," Lucida responded, handing the man a donut.

"Finally," the man said, getting ready to eat the donut.

"Don't eat it!" Lucida shouted. The man almost dropped the donut in surprise, fumbling clumsily until he finally got a firm grasp on the donut again.

"Well, why did you give it to me, then?" the man asked, clearly beginning to get ticked off.

"Hold it up in the air and yell 'Asgore!' really loud, okay?"

The man stared at Lucida for a while, his face scrunched up in confusion at her crazy demands.

"Is this some kind of prank?" the man finally said.

"No," Lucida replied, eyes darting away from the man's gaze. The man stared at Lucida for a moment longer before scoffing and walking away, eating the donut as he went.

"Darn it!" Lucida cried, "We lost one! How inconsiderate..."

Sans couldn't help but laugh. It was somewhat satisfying to see Lucida's plans backfiring on her. He had to wonder, though, if this was really her plan backfiring or if she'd intended for this too.

Just then, Lucida let out a piercing shriek, tearing through the crowd. Dropping the donuts in surprise, Sans grabbed Papyrus and followed after her, pushing past people as he tried to keep on Lucida's path. When he finally caught up, he found Lucida perched on Undyne's back, pounding on the fish warrior's shoulder's with her fists and trying to knock her opponent over.

"Why won't you fall?!" Lucida shouted in rage. Undyne stared at Lucida in confusion.

"ALPHYS! UNDYNE! WE HAVE FOUND YOU!" Papyrus cheered, "DID YOU EVER FIND THE REAL ANIME?"

"No," Alphys replied, "I thought I saw Mew-Mew, but, heh, it actually turned out to be just a cosplayer from Michigan."

"ouch," Sans said, wincing to express his sentiments.

"I know, right?!" Undyne roared, clenching her fists tightly. She seemed to be ignoring Lucida for now.

"How could you leave us behind for a Mew-Mew wannabe from Michigan?!" Lucida yelled, attempting to pound Undyne's head, though it didn't faze Undyne whatsoever. Undyne then grabbed Lucida by the back of her dress, tossing her to the ground nonchalantly, which only served to make Lucida angrier. Just then, as if only to make matters worse, Muffet, Chara, and Flowey finally showed themselves. Upon spotting them, Lucida screeched in fury, charging toward Muffet, who immediately turned tail and ran away as quickly as she possibly could with Lucida hot on her heels.

"I THINK I'LL GO BACK AND GET THE DONUTS NOW," Papyrus said once Muffet and Lucida were out of sight.

"Donuts?" Undyne asked in confusion, "What for?"

"for asgore," Sans replied hesitantly, deeply feeling the ridiculousness of what he was saying.

"Donuts for Asgore?" Alphys inquired, "What are we supposed to do with them?"

"hold them up."

Alphys and Undyne both stared at Sans like he'd grown a second head.

"Well, that's stupid," Undyne remarked, "We can't possibly just traipse across the world waving donuts in the air. We'd look like complete morons!"

"well, _donut_ look at me," Sans said, making a pun to try to make himself feel better about being the unwilling advocate for explaining Lucida's crazy plan, "lucida thought this up."

"SANS!" Papyrus yelled, "YOUR TERRIBLE PUN MADE ME RUN INTO THE EVIL HAMMER DUCK AND DIE!"

"Is he playing Kirby?" Alphys asked curiously.

"IT'S KIRBY SUPERSTAR ULTRA," Papyrus said, "AND SANS IS CERTAINLY NOT HELPING WITH HIS PUNS."

"well, i sure hope that you can kir- _beat_ it soon, bro."

Papyrus looked like he was about to explode. Sans laughed, as did Alphys and Undyne. Secretly, he knew that Papyrus enjoyed his puns, no matter how much he refused to show it. Just then, he spotted Lucida dragging an unconscious Muffet behind her.

"Come on, guys," Lucida said defeatedly, "We're going home."

"What about Asgore?!" Alphys exclaimed.

"He's the one that left us," Lucida replied, "I say he's made his decision."

Sans glared at Lucida. On the one hand, he knew this whole thing was a farce from the start and Lucida had made it all up. On the other hand, though, she'd caused a crisis and riled everyone up for no reason at all. What were her motives?

* * *

"We have gathered here to honor the life of our dear friend, Asgore. May he rest in peace."

"Uh, Lucida?" Alphys muttered, "Asgore is still alive."

"Oh yeah," Lucida responded. The search party had returned to the Zyzzyva House and were now gathered around a picture of Asgore placed on a table in the lounge. Lucida had been insistent on having this memorial of sorts, but only those from the search party were present for whatever reason.

"I can't believe he's really gone," Alphys muttered, hugging Undyne's arm tightly. She then realized what she was doing and quickly let go, her face red as a tomato.

"Now we're never going to see him again," Lucida added, her head in her hands.

"Come on, guys," Undyne prodded, "We just established that he's not dead. He's still alive."

"With this level of grief, he might as well be dead," Chara chimed in, probably more cheerfully than they should've.

"Is there something going on in here?"

Everyone immediately whirled around to see Asgore standing in the entryway to the lounge. Sans sighed in relief. For a moment, he'd been worried that Lucida had done something to him, but at least now he knew that Asgore was safe.

"Asgore! You're back!" Lucida exclaimed, racing toward Asgore and hugging him tightly.

"I can't believe you left!" Undyne shouted, also charging toward Asgore and practically lifting him off the floor with her embrace.

"You've got some nerve showing your face here," Flowey spat. Chara giggled, amused with the situation.

"WHY DID YOU LEAVE, ASGORE?" Papyrus asked innocently.

"Where did you go, anyway?" Alphys inquired.

"Um," Asgore began, "I don't really know why all of you are so excited to see me. I was merely in the bathroom."

Everyone froze. They all then looked to Lucida for an answer. Sans grinned mischeviously, his eye flaring up. Now was finally where he'd get to gauge Lucida's intentions.

"Why are you having a funeral for me?" Asgore asked nervously, eyes scanning the room.

"I-I don't get it! Rou-!"

Lucida choked on her words, having frozen in place. She looked like she was desperately fishing for something to say, but couldn't get it out. The pressure must have been too great, because, within about a minute of being stared down, Lucida passed out, collapsing unconscious to the floor. While watching the others scramble to try to help her, Sans stepped back, quickly making his way out of the room.

"there's no rhyme or reason to anything she does...unless there's something bigger going on here..."


	3. Confrontation

Sans stared at the clock beside his bed. It read 2 AM. It was highly unusual for him to not be able to sleep. Maybe it was his wariness of Lucida that kept him awake. He had no clue either way.

"welp, i guess now's as good a time as any."

Sans pulled himself out of bed and crossed the room to the door, grabbing his jacket off of the bedpost as he passed by it. He slowly pushed the door open, the soft creaking of the hinges breaking the silence of the empty hallway. Pulling on the jacket, Sans began down the hall. He counted himself lucky that the floors were carpeted. His bare, bony feet would have made too much noise against any other flooring.

"Hey, Sans!"

Sans whirled around to see Lucida standing just down the hall behind him. If he had a heart, it would have skipped a beat just then.

"what'cha doin' up?" Sans asked as Lucida came closer.

"Just hanging out, is all," Lucida replied, finally stopping a couple feet away from Sans, "Sometimes, I have a hard time sleeping. What's got you up?"

"couldn't sleep," Sans said honestly.

"Oh my pineapples, we have the same problem!" Lucida said, eyes lighting up, "We could practically be siblings! Two skeletons having trouble sleeping!"

"what are you?"

Lucida froze, her pupils disappearing in fear. Sans had decided to come right out and say what was on his mind. It wasn't like him to be serious like this, but he wasn't exactly sure how he felt about Lucida at this point.

"W-what do you mean by that?" Lucida asked nervously.

"there's something wrong about you," Sans explained, "i just can't figure you out. it's like, sometimes, you expect things to happen and they just don't. there's something that feels forced about you. nothing you do makes any sense at all."

"Not all that crystal-clear, is it?"

Sans felt the fire in his left eye flare up as it began to glow a brilliant blue.

"that's an interesting choice of words, buddy. mind telling me what you mean by that?"

"It all depends on how much you think you know."

"i told you what i know. want something more?"

Lucida tapped her finger against her arm, causing a steady ticking to resound through the silence. She then began to tense up, the ticking getting faster and faster, only capping off when tears began streaming down her cheeks.

"You don't know what it's like," Lucida muttered, "It's like a reset, but nothing's the same...except that everything's the same."

"i know my fair share about resets, buddy," Sans replied.

"Not like this," Lucida retorted, "I don't know how aware of resets you are, but I doubt you know about mine."

Sans stared at Lucida in bewilderment.

"I spent about five minutes with all of you before you ever got here," Lucida went on, "After that, I reset."

Sans' eye burned brighter, the corners of his mouth beginning to twitch.

"that's not possible," Sans said, "there's no way you reset. it takes determination to reset. monsters don't have the determination needed to do that."

"Well, I did," Lucida responded, grinning slightly, "What does that make me, I wonder?"

Sans felt a shiver shoot down his spine.

"lucida..."

"What's a name, Sans?" Lucida interrupted, "How do you know if Lucida is mine?"

"then who are you?"

"Maybe I'm nothing more than a lucid fake. I'm sure you appreciate the pun."

Sans was about to retort, but decided against it, opting to stay quiet.

"I'm just trying to get back what I lost, Sans," Lucida continued, "Just follow the script and we won't have any problems."

"what script are you talking about?"

"Ugh. I'm acting just like her, aren't I?" Lucida scoffed, looking away, "This isn't right. I'm not like this."

Sans stepped forward to try to get closer to Lucida, but, suddenly, his leg became trapped by something, making him unable to move. Looking down, he realized, to his horror, that his leg was now encased in ice, which was slowly beginning to spread up to the rest of his body.

"No," Lucida muttered, "I'll do anything I have to do to get it all back. Even if it's not the same, maybe it'll fill the void. That's all I can hope for at this point."

Sans quickly summoned a Gaster Blaster, pointing it straight at Lucida.

"let me go or i shoot," Sans demanded. Right now, he was desperate. If he didn't get Lucida to stop, she'd probably take his life.

"You can't afford not to care anymore, can you?" Lucida asked, "That's fine. Go ahead and shoot. I'll just reset and start from square one again. I'll live this entire thing all over again and you will too."

"what do you want out of us?"

"I told you that already. All I want is to get back what I lost."

"what did you lose and how do we fit into all of this?"

"It's too complicated for you to understand, Sans. Shocking, I know, but there are some things in life that even you can't comprehend."

Sans grit his teeth, glaring at Lucida with his one blazing eye.

"i'm not gonna stop, you know," he retorted, "i'm gonna keep fighting you for as long as i have to before you stop all of this. i'm not gonna give up."

"If you do that, then I'll just keep resetting," Lucida replied, "It doesn't matter how long it takes me. I will get what I want. You can't beat me, Sans."

Sans tried to reach out toward Lucida, but found both his arms now encased in the ice now creeping up his torso. The chill was beginning to sap away his strength and he feared that, if he tried to struggle, he'd just end up using it all up for naught.

"i'm gonna ask you one more time," Sans said, beads of sweat forming on his forehead, "who are you?"

Lucida stared at Sans for a moment, as if contemplating whether or not to tell him.

"You really want to know, huh?" Lucida asked.

"yes," Sans replied, "i do."

"Fine."

Lucida slowly walked forward toward Sans, tracing out his terrified smile with her finger.

"I'm an anomaly. I'm someone who once existed somewhere else. If you think that you can avoid me, you're sorely mistaken. I can and will reset until I get the ending I want, no matter how much you try to fight me."

She moved her finger from his mouth to his left eye socket, running her finger around the edge.

"I used to have friends. I used to have people I cared about. All of that was taken away from me, though. All I'm trying to do is recreate it with you."

She placed her forehead against his, letting her finger slide back down to rest against the center of his mouth.

"I am Krystal and you are my best friends."

With the last of his strength, Sans fired off the Gaster Blaster he'd summoned, engulfing both Lucida and himself in the searing beam of light.

Then, all was silent and all was dark.

"There are no ratings yet," Alphys replied nervously, "Apparently, it's a brand-new place."

"THEN THEY SHOULD HAVE SOME SPACE FOR SOME NEW FRIENDS!" Papyrus piped up, running ahead of the group.

"Hold on!" Alphys called out, running after Papyrus, "You don't even know where it is!"

Sans stared ahead. Part of him wanted to run after Papyrus and tell him not to go, but he knew that would only result in another reset.

"Is something wrong, Sans?" Toriel asked. Sans glanced back at her and saw Frisk getting ready to race after Alphys and Papyrus.

 _"heh,"_ Sans thought to himself, _"i thought i'd only ever have to deal with one resetting psychopath."_

Frisk darted off, arms out like an airplane. Toriel giggled.

 _"now I've got two."_


	4. The Mispersonification Ray

Sans was always the kind of guy who could roll with any situation thrown his way. That was why, once he found out that he was trapped in Lucida's sadistic time loop, he tried his best to adapt. Twice now he and his friends had been dragged to the Zyzzyva House and twice now had Lucida subjected them to her little game. The same events had happened twice now, including the crazy trip to Las Vegas to "search" for Asgore, who was never really missing in the first place. The only thing missing was Sans' confrontation with Lucida, which Sans wasn't too keen on repeating anyway. That was why he hadn't yet had another confrontation with Lucida about her reset, but he also figured that she didn't need to know about his ability to remember other timelines yet. He had a feeling that she might already know, but he felt more comfortable playing it safe.

Really, Sans had no idea how far Lucida would go to keep this game going or even what this game really entailed. From what Sans could read from Lucida, he knew that there was some kind of puppeteering going on, but he had no grasp on how far Lucida's powers could extend. She definitely seemed to be working off some kind of "script", as she'd called it, but that was something Sans figured he could never know the full details of.

Right now, Sans was making his way down the hall to the lobby, where Papyrus was waiting for him. As he rounded the corner, though, he heard noises coming from Alphys' room. His curiosity piqued, he pushed open the door to find Alphys working on some sort of invention, Undyne watching over her shoulder.

"hey, alphys," Sans greeted, catching the busy scientist's attention, if only momentarily, "what'cha doing?"

"I'm just working on a new invention," Alphys replied distractedly, returning to her work. That was when Sans noticed Lucida sneaking into the room behind him, making her way toward an unaware Undyne.

"What's it do?" Lucida asked once she was directly behind Undyne, startling her and causing her to whirl around to try to smack Lucida across the face. Lucida quickly ducked to avoid the blow, completely unfazed by it, and dodged around Undyne to get a better look at Alphys' creation.

"Shiny..." Lucida muttered in a trance, staring intently at the machine, "So shiny..."

"This is the Mis-Personification Ray!" Alphys declared, raising her now-finished creation into the air. It had the look of a cheap toy laser gun with a metallic finish. Both Sans and Undyne stared at it in bewilderment. Sans couldn't think of a practical purpose for such an invention. Lucida seemed excited by it, though. In fact, she was almost a little too excited by the ray gun, which told Sans that Lucida had a plan for this thing. He wouldn't be surprised if it was Lucida's "script" that caused Alphys to build this thing in the first place.

"Allow me to demonstrate," Alphys continued, aiming the ray gun at Lucida. Lucida took the shot unflinchingly. Immediately afterward, her usual unfading smile fell into a dull expression and she looked incredibly bored.

"Now, Lucida," Alphys asked, "What is your favorite thing ever?"

"Staples," Lucida droned, her voice monotone, "Staples and ball-point pens."

"See?" Alphys said, gesturing toward Lucida, "The once bubbly and random Lucida is now boring!"

Sans' smile widened. He glanced over at Undyne and saw that she looked pleased with this development as well.

"Don't worry," Alphys continued, raising the ray gun toward Lucida once more, "If I zap her again, she'll return to normal."

"do me a favor," Sans said, stepping forward and placing a hand on the ray gun, "don't."

"You know I have to, Sans," Alphys responded, firing another shot at Lucida. Lucida then perked up, staring at the ray gun and once again muttering "shiny" over and over again.

"Well, that fantasy was short-lived," Undyne groaned, "Come on, Alphys."

Alphys hurriedly followed after Undyne as both of them left the room. After that, it was just Sans and Lucida left, staring each other down. Sans noticed that Lucida looked to be just as uneasy being around him as he was around her.

"Well?" Lucida said after an awkward moment of silence, "Aren't you going to leave?"

"after you," Sans replied, gesturing toward the door with an overdramatic flourish. He could already see that Lucida was scheming to get her hands on the ray gun and could only imagine the consequences if he allowed that to happen.

Just then, Lucida lunged across the room for the gun. Before she could so much as lay a finger on it, though, Sans was able to summon a Gaster Blaster to block her path. It was an impulse move, but he was willing to resort to drastic measures to keep Lucida from causing chaos. As Lucida stared the Blaster down, though, Sans wondered if it would be enough.

"Sans, Sans, Sans," Lucida muttered, not turning her gaze from the Blaster, "I thought we were going to do just fine."

Sans tensed up. He was only barely able to keep from firing the Blaster at Lucida right then. He knew that, if he did, she would just reset again, but he thought the mere sight of the Blaster would be enough to keep Lucida at bay.

"I know you remember that night, Sans," Lucida continued, still not turning to face Sans, "You remember our little talk about my script and how, as long as you abide by the rules, everything will be okay. You remember that, no matter how many times I have to reset, I will have my way. I know you do."

Sans froze. He almost lost his hold on the Blaster, but he quickly regained control. He was on a hair trigger now and one more upset could mean another reset. Lucida had already shot down his one trump card.

"well, you remember what i said, right?" Sans pointed out, "that thing about never giving up, no matter how many times you reset? you remember that?"

"I do," Lucida answered, "Then again, I wonder how long you can keep that up. I know you, Sans. You can't keep up the same struggle for long. You'll tire out eventually."

That was it. Sans' control faltered and the Blaster fired. Instead of killing Lucida, though, she skillfully dodged around the blast, snatching the ray gun off the table and pointing it toward Sans.

"I wonder what will happen if I change up the script a little bit on this one," Lucida said, her grin widening as she glared at Sans with a manic look in her eye, "I'll excuse your little moment of rebellion and, instead, I'm going to have as much fun with this thing as I did the first time. That sound all right to you?"

Before Sans could respond, Lucida fired off a blast from the gun. Sans quickly teleported, a kind of subconscious instinct kicking in that he hadn't felt since the last time he'd fought Chara. He ended up just behind Lucida. He readied to strike, but she whirled around to fire off another blast. This one was fired off at a much closer proximity to Sans, but he was still able to dodge, narrowly teleporting away in time. This time, he was on the other side of the room from Lucida, who immediately fired off one more blast. This time, when Sans teleported to dodge it, he decided to leave the room entirely, retreating back to his own room. He slumped back against his closed bedroom door, wiping the sweat from his brow.

"that was a close one..."

He'd left Lucida alone with the gun. At this point, though, he figured he didn't have much of a choice. If he'd stayed for much longer, Lucida probably would have landed a shot on him. He wanted to try to figure out a way to get the gun away from Lucida, but she was much faster that he gave her credit for.

Suddenly, there was a forceful knock on the door behind him, the pounding reverberating through his body. He was almost terrified to open the door, but he decided to do so anyway. As soon as he opened the door, though, he caught a quick glimpse of Lucida's crazed grin before his vision was filled with a flash of blinding light and his thoughts blurred out.

* * *

By the time Sans could finally think clearly again, he found a thousand thoughts all running through his head. There were questions about Lucida, her intentions, her origins, and even how exactly the ray gun had affected him. It was as if his mind had decided to dump every train of thought on him and switch them all on at once. Even his favorite jacket began to feel burdensome. He frantically pulled it off and tossed it across the room, watching it as it lazily flopped onto his bed. As he stared at the jacket, he found himself hating it more and more.

He started to pace around the room to try to collect his thoughts, but, after tripping over his own feet, he broke down, kicking his slippers off and picking them up off the floor to chuck them at the wall. He pulled his socks off as well, but they didn't fly through the air as well as the slippers had, so it didn't feel nearly as satisfying to throw them.

He then turned to look at himself in the mirror. His pupils had grown in size and had both turned the same blue as his glowing eye shone in, but they weren't glowing. His eyes certainly hadn't looked like this before. His grin also seemed wider and more sincerely happy, even with how rattled he currently felt.

"Hey. Are you okay?"

Sans jumped in surprise, letting out a yelp. He whirled around to find Chara standing in his doorway, staring at him in shocked bewilderment.

"OF COURSE! I'M FINE! OKAY! NEVER BEEN BETTER!"

Sans replied to Chara's question quickly and nervously. As he spoke, he noticed his voice was now uppercase instead of his normal lowercase, much more like Papyrus'. He'd never spoken in uppercase before, but he didn't have time to care about that now. He knew for a fact that this was the result of the Mis-Personification Ray that Lucida had fired at him. It was making the strange behavior he was showing now feel entirely natural to him.

"Okay then," Chara replied incredulously. They then shut the door behind them, and, before Sans knew it, he was alone in a room with Chara for the first time since the last time they'd tried to kill him.

"Listen," Chara began, "I know we're not exactly on the best terms, but I wanted to talk with you for once. I know you remember resets. Was there a reset that happened here recently, or was that just in my imagination?"

"IT'S LUCIDA," Sans replied, cutting straight to the point, "SHE'S THE ONE RESETTING."

"What?" Chara exclaimed, their brow furrowing in confusion, "She's a monster, though. Monsters can't reset. You need determination to be able to reset."

"WE HAVE TO FIND LUCIDA," Sans muttered, getting antsy, "SHE'S DEFINITELY MESSING WITH THINGS SHE SHOULDN'T BE MESSING WITH."

Sans knew this is was what he should be feeling more than anything else, but he couldn't feel this one specific cause wholeheartedly. His mind was still a messed-up jumble of anything and everything that he still couldn't sort out. He felt restless and hyperactive and it was beginning to grate at his nerves.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Chara asked again, "You're acting really weird."

"THIS IS WEIRD!" Sans replied, "IT'S WEIRD, BUT IT FEELS SO NORMAL! I KNOW THIS ISN'T HOW I ACT, BUT I CAN'T NOT ACT THIS WAY! IT JUST FEELS SO RIGHT!"

Before Chara could say anything more, Sans decided he'd had enough of standing around, so he pushed Chara aside and flung open his bedroom door, tearing out into the hall and racing aimlessly down the seemingly endless hallways of the Zyzzyva House. He felt like he had way too much energy balled up inside of him and he needed to get it out somehow. In the back of his mind, though, he knew he needed to find Lucida and set everything right again.

* * *

Finally, Sans had tired himself out. It had been about an hour of charging down the halls at top speed, but he finally felt like he'd expended all his energy. He slumped over, placing his hands on his knees and breathing heavily. Beads of sweat dotted his forehead and his chest heaved significantly with every breath. He then straightened up and threw his head back, which immediately caused him to lose his balance and fall over backward onto the plush carpet below him. He lay there for a moment staring at the ceiling before Chara appeared, looming over Sans angrily.

"Why'd you run off like that?!" Chara growled, "You didn't even explain anything! You just left me in the dark and raced off like your rear end was on fire!"

"IT WAS JUST WHAT I FELT LIKE DOING!" Sans replied, "I'M SORRY I LEFT YOU BEHIND LIKE THAT, THOUGH."

Chara reeled back in bewildered shock.

"Did you just...apologize to me?"

"SURE," Sans replied, "I FEEL BAD ABOUT LEAVING YOU BEHIND, SO I APOLOGIZED."

It may very well have been the first time Sans had ever sincerely apologized to Chara. After all of the horrible things Chara had done, it was only natural for Sans to hate them. Now, though, he didn't feel any kind of hate toward Chara at all. It was as if it had all melted away along with every other trait of his original personality.

"LOOK," Sans began, suddenly remembering what he was supposed to be telling Chara, "LUCIDA HAS THIS THING CALLED A MIS-PERSONIFICATION RAY. SHE FIRED IT AT ME AND THAT'S WHY I'M ACTING LIKE THIS. IF YOU CAN GET IT BACK FROM HER, YOU CAN REVERSE THIS."

"I don't know..." Chara mused, "I kind of like you better when you're not on my case all the time."

If Sans were acting like himself, that would be where he'd come up with some witty retort to try to get on Chara's nerves. With his current personality, though, the remark didn't faze Sans in the slightest. Instead, Sans vaulted himself to his feet, feeling determined.

"COME ON!" Sans shouted, "WE HAVE TO FIND LUCIDA!"

He then marched forward, Chara begrudgingly following behind him.

"So," Chara said, "What does this Mis-Personification Ray do, exactly?"

"FROM WHAT I COULD GATHER," Sans replied, "IT MIXES UP SOMEONE'S PERSONALITY AND MAKES THEM ACT LIKE...NOT THEMSELVES."

"Does it make their minds into soup too?" Chara retorted, "because that's what I've been getting from you."

"I TRIED TO TAKE THE RAY FROM LUCIDA EARLIER," Sans continued, ignoring Chara, "BUT I COULDN'T GET IT. SHE WAS TOO FAST FOR ME."

"That makes two people you're vastly outclassed by," Chara said, still trying to get on Sans' nerves. Their efforts were in vain, though. Sans simply didn't care about Chara's remarks.

"SHE WASN'T SUPPOSED TO TAKE THE RAY FROM ALPHYS' ROOM IN THE FIRST PLACE," Sans went on, "IF ALPHYS HADN'T LEFT IT THERE UNATTENDED, THEN THIS NEVER WOULD HAVE HAPPENED AND EVERYTHING WOULD BE OKAY."

Chara stayed silent this time, only responding with an annoyed huff.

"THIS IS ALL PART OF HER GAME, I KNOW IT..."

"Game?" Chara repeated, perking up, "What game?"

"LUCIDA'S PLAYING WITH US," Sans replied, "SHE RESET WHEN I STEPPED OUT OF LINE AND CONFRONTED HER. SHE WANTS US ALL TO FOLLOW HER RULES AND DO WHAT SHE WANTS. SHE'S GOT SOME KIND OF SCRIPT SHE WANTS US ALL TO FOLLOW AND SHE'S THREATENED TO RESET OF WE TRY TO BREAK OUT OF IT."

"Are you serious?!" Chara exclaimed angrily, "She's trying to play us like her puppets?!"

"IT'S SO INFURIATING!" Sans responded, getting just as angry as Chara, "IT'S LIKE SHE DOESN'T EVEN CARE ABOUT ANY OF US AND WHAT WE WANT! SHE JUST WANTS TO USE US TO GET WHAT SHE WANTS!"

Normally, Sans would never get this visibly angry. Now, though, he felt like he couldn't hold back. It felt so incredibly wrong to him that Lucida was doing all of this and he couldn't help but express it.

"Hold on," Chara said, stopping Sans' rant short, "What exactly is it that she wants, anyway?"

"I-I DON'T ACTUALLY KNOW," Sans replied hesitantly, unable to come up with a suitable answer, "SHE MADE IT CLEAR TO ME THAT THERE WAS SOMETHING SHE WANTED—SOMETHING ABOUT GETTING BACK SOMETHING SHE LOST—BUT SHE NEVER MENTIONED WHAT EXACTLY IT WAS THAT SHE LOST IN THE FIRST PLACE."

"I just don't see how any of what she's doing would give her any sort of gain," Chara mused aloud, "It's all just random nonsense that doesn't really fit together at all."

Sans tapped a finger against his arm, the steady clicking rhythm being the only sound between Sans and Chara for quite a while. Eventually, Sans noticed Papyrus walk by further down the hall, looking to be in a daze. Sans hurriedly stepped around Chara and headed for Papyrus, who eventually noticed his brother approaching him.

"sans?" Papyrus muttered. Sans was awestruck. Papyrus was speaking in lowercase. That was when Sans realized that Lucida must have gotten to Papyrus.

"YOU TOO?" Sans asked. Now it was Papyrus' turn to look awestruck at his brother.

"are you actually speaking in uppercase?" Papyrus said bewilderedly.

"WELL, IT'S NO STRANGER THAN YOU SPEAKING IN LOWERCASE!" Sans pointed out.

"What is all this uppercase and lowercase business anyway?" Chara butted in, having caught up to Sans, "To me, it just seems like one of you is speaking louder than he normally does and one of you is a lot less annoying than usual."

"UPPERCASE AND LOWERCASE ARE THE WAYS A SKELETON SPEAKS," Sans replied, "OUR VOICES ARE OUR FONTS AND OUR TONES ARE OUR CASES."

"That would explain some things..." Chara muttered.

"anyway," Papyrus interrupted, trying to get the conversation back on track, "why _are_ you speaking in uppercase?"

"THE SAME REASON YOU'RE SPEAKING IN LOWERCASE," Sans answered, "THERE'S A PSYCHO WITH A PERSONALITY-CHANGING GUN RUNNING AROUND AND HER NAME IS LUCIDA."

"personality-changing gun?" Papyrus repeated in confusion, "how did lucida get something like that?"

"SHE'S A PSYCHO, PAPYRUS!" Sans shouted, "SHE'S ABSOLUTELY INSANE AND SHE'S RUNNING AROUND CHANGING PEOPLE'S PERSONALITIES AND WE HAVE TO STOP HER!"

Sans started to run off, but Papyrus grabbed him by the back of his shirt collar before he could get anywhere.

"hold on, sans," Papyrus said, "we can't just go confronting her without some sort of plan. We have to think rationally here."

Sans sighed, though, being hurried, it sounded more like a despondent huff. Usually, Sans was the voice of reason to Papyrus' crazy schemes. Now it was the other way around and it made Sans feel uncomfortable.

"Wow," Chara mused aloud, "It's like you two have swapped places. What's next? Alphys suplexing boulders? Toriel killing humans?"

"knock it off, chara," Papyrus scolded, "this is serious."

Chara's eyes widened significantly. They'd just been told off by Papyrus of all people, which, apparently, was enough to get them to shut up for the time being.

"what's causing lucida to do this?" Papyrus asked, turning back to Sans.

"THAT'S KIND OF A LONG STORY," Sans started. He figured he'd tell Papyrus now and deal with the consequences later.

* * *

Sans' bony fingers rapped against the back of the wooden chair as he waited anxiously for Chara to return. Between himself, Papyrus, and Chara, the three of them had been able to come up with a plan to try to get the Mis-Personification Ray back from Lucida. The first step involved Chara getting Lucida's attention and luring her into the kitchen, where Sans and Papyrus would be waiting. As Chara hadn't yet had their personality swapped, they were the perfect bait for Lucida.

Beside him, Papyrus chuckled to himself. Sans gave him an incredulous look.

"WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING ABOUT?" Sans asked.

"i'm just imagining what chara might be like if lucida zapped them, that's all," Papyrus replied. If Sans were in his right mind, he'd probably be wishing for Chara to get zapped, but he couldn't feel that now.

Sans stared at Papyrus for a while longer. The usual sparkle in his eye sockets was now gone, replaced with a tired look that would usually be Sans' hallmark. He was leaning against another chair, letting it hold most of his weight. His scarf, usually tied neatly, now hung over his shoulders messily and he played with one end of it with his fingers. His gloves were gone too.

"HEY, PAPYRUS?" Sans said hesitantly. Papyrus lazily shifted his gaze to Sans.

"yeah?"

"DO YOU FEEL AS WEIRD AS I DO?" Sans asked. Papyrus looked away for a moment, contemplating the question before finally answering.

"yeah."

Sans waited for Papyrus to continue, the room falling into an awkward silence.

"YOU WANT TO ELABORATE ON THAT?" Sans eventually prodded, circling one hand in the air as a signal for Papyrus to continue. Papyrus shrugged, staring blankly into the den just outside the kitchen.

"you know what it's like," Papyrus replied, "you know you should be acting like you usually do, but something inside of you won't let you. it's like being in a badly-written fanfiction where the author makes up excuses to bend characters however they want to just to achieve some kind of convoluted plot. you know?"

Sans stared at Papyrus, his eyes narrowing in confusion.

"NOW YOU'RE JUST NOT MAKING ANY SENSE, PAPYRUS," Sans said, "WHAT KIND OF TERRIBLE FANFICTION HAS A RAY GUN THAT CHANGES PEOPLE'S PERSONALITIES?"

"a really stupid one, i guess," Papyrus replied with a chuckle. Sans laughed too. Something about the sheer ridiculousness of the conversation was strangely funny to him.

Just then, there was a crash. Sans and Papyrus immediately turned to the entrance to the den to see Chara tear into the kitchen, a look of genuine fear on their face. Lucida followed closely behind, brandishing the Mis-Personification Ray and wearing a disturbing grin on her face. As she ran by Sans and Papyrus, Papyrus lunged for her, grabbing her around her waist and tackling her to the floor. She also lost her grip on the gun, which clattered against the tile as it was thrown across the room.

"game's up, lucida," Papyrus spat, pinning Lucida down. The skeleton girl struggled against her captor, but Papyrus proved too strong for her. Sans then started toward the gun, but, before he could get to it, Chara darted for it, snatching it off the floor. They then used the rest of their momentum to dodge past Sans, ending up on the other side of the kitchen.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Sans shouted.

"I'm taking an opportunity, Sans," Chara said, an evil smirk forming on their face, "With this thing, I can remove every threat from the picture. Then, with Frisk finally on my side, we can erase this pathetic world once and for all!"

Sans froze, his body locking up in shock. He could practically kick himself for ever trusting Chara, but his current personality had made it seem like such a good idea. Was this how Papyrus usually felt around them too?

Chara's first action was to aim the ray gun at Papyrus and fire off a shot. Sans would have tried to take it for him, but he stayed frozen in place, his current emotional state preventing him from even moving. As Papyrus took the hit, he winced before collapsing on top of Lucida. After that, Chara raced out of the room.

Papyrus then pushed himself up, rubbing his hand against the side of his head. Lucida found an opening and wiggled out from under Papyrus before scrambling to her feet and starting after Chara. Before she could leave, though, Sans quickly summoned a Gaster Blaster to block her escape. He was practically trembling. This was something he really didn't want to do, but he knew he had to.

"S-Sans?" Lucida stuttered, turning back toward Sans, "Wh-what are you doing?"

"WE NEED A RESET RIGHT NOW, LUCIDA," Sans replied shakily, "WE HAVE TO PREVENT THIS BEFORE IT HAPPENS."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold up!" Lucida shouted, backing away from the blaster nervously. Suddenly, Papyrus barrelled into Sans, causing him to lose control of the blaster. Lucida dove to the floor as the blast tore past just above her.

"YOU CAN'T DO THIS, SANS!" Papyrus shouted, "YOU KNOW YOU DON'T WANT TO KILL LUCIDA, NO MATTER HOW MANY BAD THINGS SHE'S DONE."

"I KNOW THAT, PAPYRUS," Sans replied solemnly, trying not to choke as he forced himself to say what he knew he had to say, "BUT THIS IS ABOUT THE SAFETY OF EVERYONE. WE HAVE TO DO THIS TO STOP CHARA."

"Hold on a second!" Lucida interjected, "You might not want to do that! I have no idea if the effects of the Mis-Personification Ray will persist after a reset or not!"

"WHY WOULD THEY?" Sans asked.

"I don't know," Lucida replied, "but trust me when I tell you that the way that ray works is beyond anything of this world. It very well could transcend the fabric of time and space."

Sans stared wide-eyed at Lucida, trying to comprehend what she'd just told him. After trying and failing to figure it out, he shook his head in frustration.

"SO WHAT DO WE DO, THEN?" Sans asked, growing frantic.

"I've got this." Lucida declared, pushing herself to her feet before racing out of the room.

"HOLD ON! WAIT!" Sans shouted, running after her. Papyrus followed close behind. It definitely seemed like Lucida was trying to follow Chara, but Sans wasn't even sure she knew what she'd do when she finally caught up.

Suddenly, there was a crash that seemed to come from just down the hall.

"That's coming from Undyne's room!" Lucida said, "We've got to hurry!"

They reached Undyne's room in no time at all. Lucida tried to open the door and, upon finding it locked, she slammed herself against the door to try to force it open, but it was no good.

"YOU'RE THE OWNER OF THIS PLACE, AREN'T YOU?!" Sans asked frantically, "DON'T YOU HAVE A MASTER KEY OR SOMETHING?"

"They're downstairs in the lobby!" Lucida groaned, slumping against the door, "I won't be able to reach them in time!"

Sans tensed up, staring at the door. Just then, an idea came to him.

"STAND BACK."

Lucida hurriedly scrambled away from the door as Sans summoned one of his Gaster Blasters. With a powerful blast of energy and a thundering explosion, the door was completely obliterated. Inside the room, Chara stared back at the ruined doorway in shock. In their hand was a knife held precariously over Undyne's neck. The normally fearless warrior was now a quivering mess, seeming helpless against Chara.

Sans brought out another Blaster, aiming it at Chara. Chara scoffed before getting up, dropping the knife and holding their hands in the air. Lucida then gleefully rushed toward the Mis-Personification Ray, which was lying on the floor rather close to Undyne. She ran her hands over the barrel before pressing down on a previously hidden button. Sans felt himself getting lightheaded as he slumped back against Papyrus and the Blaster he was controlling dematerialized when he lost his focus. Both his vision and his thoughts were fuzzy for a moment before they finally cleared up.

"SANS?" Papyrus asked hesitantly, "ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?"

Sans was silent for a moment, staring up at Papyrus.

"yeah. i'm fine."

A huge grin spread across Papyrus' face.

"SANS! YOU'RE BACK TO NORMAL AGAIN!" Papyrus cheered, hugging Sans tightly. Sans chuckled, patting Papyrus' arm affectionately. From across the room, he heard Undyne groan before she stood, rubbing her head.

"What the heck happened?" Undyne asked groggily. Lucida sighed in relief.

"Thank pineapples that's over," Lucida said, wiping sweat from her forehead.

"What happened in here?!"

Sans and Papyrus whirled around and everyone stared at Alphys, who was peeking into the doorway worriedly.

"you might not want to know," Sans replied, "let's just say that most of us were a bit out of our minds today."

Papyrus grunted, clenching his fists.

"PLEASE TELL ME THAT WASN'T A PUN, SANS."

"i can't. it was."

Papyrus screeched angrily as the others laughed.

"So," Alphys said once the laughter died down, "Toriel just got back from the store. None of us even knew she left, but she came back with 200 boxes of toaster waffles for some reason. Not even she knows why."

"Yes!" Lucida shouted excitedly, "Thank pineapples at least that turned out right!"

Lucida then raced out of the room, leaving the others to try to figure out what she meant.

"She's so weird," Undyne groaned exasperatedly.

"you have no idea…"


	5. A Very Zyzzyva Christmas

Christmas was always a wonderful time, no matter where it was celebrated. That was why, even in spite of Lucida, Sans decided he was going to let his worries go for the season and have as good a Christmas with his friends as they could muster. At the moment, Sans was "supervising" as Undyne and Papyrus strung up lights on the outside of the Zyzzyva House.

"A-are you sure you'll be okay up there, Undyne?" a worried Alphys asked from just beside Sans. It was reasonable why she'd be nervous. Lucida had only been able to find one ladder, so Undyne had climbed up first and was now precariously perched on a ledge while she hung lights. Papyrus was using the ladder.

"I'll be fine, Alphys!" Undyne called back, "Nothing's going to happen!"

Just then, the window beside Undyne shot open and Lucida popped out, shouting a hardy "Merry Christmas!". Startled, Undyne lost her footing and fell from the ledge, landing face-first in a pile of snow below. Alphys gasped and rushed to help Undyne up, while Sans glared at Lucida.

"Merry Christmas, Undyne!" Lucida shouted down to Undyne.

"HELLO, LUCIDA!" Papyrus greeted her enthusiastically.

"I hate her," Undyne growled angrily. Sans sighed. Undyne would probably hate Lucida even more if she knew what Sans knew, but Lucida would probably just reset if that ever happened.

"LIGHTEN UP, UNDYNE," Papyrus said, "SHE'S JUST TRYING TO SPREAD CHRISTMAS SPIRIT!"

"Well, can't she go take her "Christmas spirit" somewhere else?" Undyne snapped, "We're busy here."

"Note taken, Undyne!" Lucida replied, "Bye!"

With that, Lucida slammed the window shut and she was gone. Undyne breathed a sigh of relief.

"I swear, she gets on my nerves," Undyne muttered. Sans gave a quick nod of agreement, although Lucida bugged him for different reasons. He just hoped none of that would pop up between now and Christmas.

* * *

"Looking good, guys!" Alphys shouted up to Papyrus and Undyne as they hung the last of the lights.

"Thanks, Alph!" Undyne replied with a toothy smirk, "Things have definitely gone a lot smoother since Lucida left!"

Sans gave Undyne an approving thumbs-up. Now that the four of them had finished their duties outside, they could go back inside and lounge around again. Sans was definitely looking forward to that. Maybe he'd make himself some hot chocolate too.

Just then, he noticed someone out of the corner of his eye. He was making his way toward the Zyzzyva House, his hands shoved in the pockets of his heavy leather coat. Sans recognized him almost immediately.

"hey," Sans called, "hey, you. you're the guy that worked that fast-food joint at the mtt resort, aren't you?"

He immediately perked up, his tan fur practically standing on end.

"Oh," he replied, seeming to relax a bit, "Yeah. You're one of the comedians."

"sans," Sans introduced himself, reaching his hand out for a handshake, "and, if i remember correctly, you're burgerpants, right?"

Undyne snickered at the name, causing Burgerpants to turn red with embarrassment.

"Yeah, whatever," he groaned, "That's all anyone seems to call me at this point anyway. Even I forgot my own name 'cuz I've been called that so much."

"what'cha doin' around here?" Sans asked, "You seem to be in a hurry."

"Well," Burgerpants began, "I was actually paid to do a favor for somebody. I was supposed to come here and...do a thing? I don't know. I already forgot. I figured I'd ask someone and go from there."

"Was it some kind of delivery?" Alphys asked, "Christmas-gram? Playing Santa? Something like that?"

"Nah," Burgerpants responded, "It was something really weird...Oh! Right! I was supposed to kidnap some chick."

"What?!" Undyne shouted in disbelief.

"KIDNAPPING?!" Papyrus also yelled.

"Whoops," Burgerpants hissed, "Probably shouldn't have said that out loud."

"what are you doing taking jobs like that?" Sans asked, "i know you wanted to get as far away from the fast food industry as possible, but this seems like a bit much."

Sans noticed his left eye involuntarily flare up as he spoke. He was pretty sure he knew who was behind this little kidnapping scheme and he really wasn't too keen on figuring out where she was trying to go with it.

"Okay, buddy. No need to jump the gun," Burgerpants chuckled, fearfully backing away from Sans, "The chick asked me to kidnap her and I'm pretty desperate for money. The job hunt isn't really going too well and the landlord's been knocking up a storm asking for the rent."

"hold up," Sans said, backing down, "she came up to you _wanting_ to be kidnapped?"

"Look, buddy," Burgerpants began with a shrug, "I'm not about to decline money. I figure, if she wants to be kidnapped, I'm not gonna get in trouble with the law for doing it. Sure, it's weird as heck, but it's what she wants and, as long as she's paying for it, I'm not gonna turn her down."

Sans' eye burned again, his gaze darting away from Burgerpants. What reason could Lucida possibly have for wanting someone to kidnap her? It just didn't make any sense.

Then again, claiming Asgore had run away only to have everyone end up on a wild goose chase for him in Las Vegas also didn't make sense and she'd done that twice already, so Sans really shouldn't have been surprised.

"okay, listen," Sans proposed, "how much is she paying you?"

"Fifty bucks."

"then i'll pay you a hundred to go home and forget about all this. sound good?"

Burgerpants shrugged, nodding his head. Sans nodded as well, reaching into his jacket pocket for his wallet.

"What the heck is even going on anymore?" Undyne asked confusedly.

"SANS?" Papyrus piped up, "IS THERE A REASON YOU'RE PAYING BURGER MAN TO LEAVE?"

"yep," Sans responded, handing Burgerpants a one-hundred dollar bill, "lucida."

Burgerpants took the money from Sans, hastily shoved it in his pocket, then quickly turned to leave, speed-walking through the snow.

"YOU THINK LUCIDA HIRED BURGER MAN?"

"i don't just think so," Sans said, "i know so. this has her name written all over it."

"Lucida?" Undyne asked, a look of utter bewilderment on her face, "Why would Lucida do something like that?"

Sans sighed, stepping back to where Undyne was and placing a hand on her arm.

"undyne. since when has lucida ever made any sense?"

* * *

Sans trudged through the lobby, where Asgore, Toriel, and Frisk were currently decorating. Papyrus, Undyne, and Alphys were directly behind him, but he'd be going a separate way from them soon enough.

Sans then noticed Frisk wave to him from their place on Toriel's shoulders. Sans sheepishly waved back. He would have been a bit more enthusiastic, but he had a lot on his mind at the moment. Frisk picked up on this, though, as they whispered something to Toriel. Toriel nodded, letting Frisk down to promptly run toward Sans.

"hey, kid," Sans greeted them, "what's up?"

Frisk huffed, crossing their arms. Sans chuckled softly. He knew exactly what that meant.

"nothing's wrong," he answered, ruffling Frisk's hair with his hand, "i'm just thinkin' about things, that's all."

"HELLO, HUMAN!" Papyrus suddenly cheered, coming up behind Sans, "WE HAVE FINISHED WITH OUR OUTDOOR DECORATING! ALL OF THE LIGHTS ARE OFFICIALLY STRUNG!"

Frisk clapped happily, a look of glee on their face.

"NOW THE GREAT PAPYRUS WILL HELP WITH THE INDOOR DECORATING! MY SUPERIOR DECORATING EYE WILL MAKE SURE THIS PLACE IS LOOKING ITS ABSOLUTE BEST! NYEH HEH HEH!"

Frisk squealed happily as Papyrus swept them off the ground and onto his shoulders. Sans laughed, watching as they made for the box of decorations. When Sans decided to start walking again, Papyrus had taken a wreath out of the box and placed it onto Frisk's head, calling them the "Grand Ruler of Christmas". If there was one thing Papyrus knew how to do, it was give the kid a fun time.

Sans rounded the corner, then took a flight of stairs up to the second floor. On his way down the hallway, he spotted Shyren and Napstablook hanging wreaths on the doors.

"hey, guys," Sans called to them, "either of you seen lucida?"

"oh," Napstablook responded quietly, "sh-she actually came by here a second ago. she said she had an important job for mettaton. i don't know where they went, though."

Sans sighed.

"i'm sorry," Napstablook continued, "i know i'm not helpful. i'm sorry for wasting your time."

"no, no, no," Sans replied, "it's fine. i'll just— _wait_. you said she needed _mettaton_?"

"yes..."

Sans' pupils faded out. If this had anything to do with what had happened earlier...

"i've gotta go," Sans said, hurrying off, "thanks for the info!"

"oh," he just barely heard Napstablook say, "you're welcome."

* * *

Sans placed his hands on his kneecaps, breathing heavily. He'd been searching for Lucida for what seemed like forever. He'd checked the lounge, her room, and practically everywhere else he could think of, but she was nowhere to be found. Now he was certain that Lucida was up to no good.

He stood as straight as he could again, taking a few more exhausted steps down the hall. That was when he finally saw Mettaton turn the corner.

"mettaton!" Sans called. Mettaton, immediately turned to Sans and walked toward him. Sans then noticed that there was extremely off about Mettaton.

"Yes, darling?" Mettaton asked, wearing a smirk Sans wasn't quite sure he liked.

"hey..." Sans began hesitantly, "have you seen lucida anywhere?"

"What if I have?" Mettaton replied, "What then?"

Sans' brow furrowed.

"well, i'd like to know where she is," he stated. Mettaton laughed, only making Sans more suspicious.

"Oh, darling!" Mettaton cackled, "Lucida's out of the picture! I run this house now!"

Sans' eye flared up and he quickly backed away from Mettaton.

"what the heck happened to you?!" Sans shouted, "what did lucida do to you?!"

"Doesn't matter!" Mettaton answered with a flourish, "All that matters now is that I rule this house and all of you answer to me!"

Sans shuddered and he quickly summoned a pair of Gaster Blasters for his own defense, pointing them straight at Mettaton. Mettaton didn't seem fazed in the slightest, though, as a flock of mini-Mettatons appeared around him, floating in the air with their tiny parasols.

"A little birdie told me you only have one HP, Sansy," Mettaton crooned, "It'd be a shame if that one were to become zero, wouldn't it? All too easy, too."

Sans froze, his Blasters dissolving to thin air. Mettaton cackled once more.

"Excellent," Mettaton said, "Now, you're coming with me. You'll make for a good hostage."

* * *

Sans sat stiffly in the chair Mettaton had tied him to, nervously watching the mini-Mettatons that floated threateningly around him. Sans knew that one touch from those things was enough to kill him, so he wasn't about to try anything. As such, he was forced to sit back and watch as Mettaton gathered everyone else in the lounge and forced them to dance, threatening anyone who didn't with a painful death. Mettaton stood in the balcony above them, bemusedly watching his prisoners with Sans seated directly beside him.

"Ha ha, yes!" Mettaton exclaimed gleefully, "Dance, everyone! Dance!"

Sans grimaced. As much as he would have liked to say that this was the most stupid evil plan he'd ever heard of, he knew that saying that was as good as saying "kill me now". Still, though, he found Mettaton's demands to be utterly ridiculous. What kind of evil dictator orders their subjects to dance?

That was when Sans realized that all of this had to be Lucida's influence. There was no way Mettaton would be making these demands if it weren't for her. Sans then started to assume the worst, namely that his own death might be part of Lucida's plans. Just the thought of it sent a chill down his spine.

Just then, Mettaton leaned over the balcony, staring down into the dancing crowd below him. He clicked his tongue before jumping down, landing just in front of Chara, who, Sans quickly noticed, wasn't dancing.

"Are we going to have a problem, Chara?" Mettaton asked sternly. Chara huffed, crossing their arms in defiance. Mettaton then snapped, causing a large disco ball to appear over Chara's head. When he did, though, the mini-Mettatons surrounding Sans disappeared. Sans' eye sockets widened as he immediately saw his opening.

"Do you see this disco ball, Chara?"

Sans' eye flared up and a bone shot up from the ground just behind him, cutting the ropes that held him to the chair.

"Yes," Chara replied to Mettaton, expression unchanging, "What about it?"

Sans didn't stay to see what would happen next, racing out of the room before Mettaton could realize he'd escaped. He did faintly hear Alphys scream as he ran, though. He winced, not daring to wonder what it could have meant. He just kept running, not even caring that his legs were already threatening to give out on him because of all the running he'd done earlier. He just knew that, if Mettaton found him, he was done for.

"Sans!"

Sans stopped short, almost tumbling over. He frantically looked around for the source of the voice before spotting Lucida waving to him from a door down the hall, motioning for him to come. With no other options in sight, Sans decided to trust Lucida's lead, racing into closet she'd supposedly holed up in. She then shut the door behind him, leaning back against it. The single lightbulb above them cast just enough light to allow Sans to see that Lucida was covered in grease and her dress was singed in a few places.

"Thank goodness you're okay. I wasn't sure if you-"

"what did you do?" Sans snapped. Lucida froze, her pupils fading out.

"Try to teach Flowey the true meaning of Christmas?" she replied hesitantly, a nervous smile spread across her face.

"you're aware that i could have _died_ , right?"

"Look," Lucida said, "I really didn't mean for this to happen. I was supposed to teach Flowey the true meaning of Christmas by staging my own kidnapping and waiting for him to come around to the fact that Christmas is about spending time with the ones you love and all that."

"that's dumb."

"I know, okay?! I just had to do it! When you paid off Burgerpants, though, I didn't know _how_ I was going to do it. That was when I decided I was going to try to reprogram Mettaton and get him to do it. Unfortunately, though, I think I tweaked things a bit too much."

"how do you reprogram a ghost?!"

"I don't know! The point is I sorta messed up! It's okay though because I know how to get us out of this!"

Sans' eye sockets went blank.

"because this was part of your plan too?"

Lucida looked as if she was about to speak, but she stopped herself, staring blankly at Sans for a moment.

"It wasn't supposed to happen just yet..." Lucida said, "but yes. It was."

 **"** **you're aware that mettaton could have** _ **killed me**_ **, right?"**

"I know! I'm sorry!" Lucida pleaded, "Just please trust me! I can get us out of this mess, I swear!"

Sans huffed, closing his eyes in contemplation.

"fine," he finally replied, "i'll bite. what's your plan?"

"Okay," Lucida began, "So, there's only one thing that can save us now: the Mispersonification Ray."

"i thought alphys destroyed that," Sans retorted.

"Do you really think so?" Lucida replied cheekily.

"you didn't."

"Yep. I switched it out."

Sans sighed in exasperation. Of course Lucida was going to keep that stupid thing, even after all the trouble it caused.

"so where is it?"

"Uh..." Lucida groaned, "It's in my room."

"well, it's really gonna help us in there," Sans deadpanned.

"We have to go get it," she said, "but we can't go together. We have to distract Mettaton first. I can't do it 'cuz he thinks he ran me out of the place."

"are you kidding?!" Sans snapped, "he's gonna dust me!"

"I'm counting on you, Sans!" Lucida said, ignoring him and throwing open the closet door, "Meet me in my room when you're done!"

"did you not hear the part about me probably getting killed?! lucida!"

It was too late. Lucida was off like a shot, racing down the hall at top speed. Sans groaned, starting after her. He didn't really see any point to distracting Mettaton at that point, so he decided to just head straight to Lucida's room and take whatever verbal punishment she had for him when he got there.

"There you are!"

Sans immediately locked up, slowly turning his head to see Mettaton glaring at him from down the hall. In that instant, the air seemed to grow ten degrees colder.

"crap.."

* * *

Sans finally burst into Lucida's room, slamming the door shut behind him. His chest heaved as he wiped beads of sweat from his skull and he was still trembling from his close encounter.

"lucida!" Sans called, not seeing her anywhere, "please tell me you're in here by now!"

He then spotted Lucida crawling out from underneath her bed. She then jumped up onto her feet and turned to face Sans.

"I've been here for a while now," she replied, "Where were _you_?

"i was running for my life from a homicidal television personality," sans retorted, "you try being the distraction sometime."

"I'm just saying," Lucida said, "You could have got here a little quicker."

"and _i'm_ just saying that _you_ had the easy job."

"Whatever," Lucida finished, making for the dresser, "Let's just block the door."

Sans' eye flared up and he desperately tried to keep himself from doing anything drastic. After a minute of trying to calm himself down, he moved aside, letting Lucida shove the dresser up against the door.

"okay," Sans started, "now, where's the mispersonification ray?"

Lucida froze, staring blankly at Sans.

"you forgot, didn't you?"

"Yep..."

Sans growled and his telekinesis immediately kicked in, letting him lift up and throw several objects across the room as he desperately searched for the Ray.

"What are you doing?!" Lucida shouted, "Stop that!"

"i'm searching for this stupid thing you lost!" Sans yelled back, quickly losing his patience, "now, where is it?!"

"I know you're in there, Sans!"

Sans shuddered as Mettaton angrily pounded on the door. He then started to throw items faster.

"Wait!" Lucida snapped, grabbing Sans' arm to get him to stop, "Let's think! Where do girls hide things they don't want anyone else to find?"

Sans and Lucida both came to the same sudden realization simultaneously, as they both looked behind them at Lucida's dresser.

"I hid it...in the dresser," Lucida muttered slowly. Sans slapped his hand against his forehead.

"Well," Lucida said, turning back to Sans, "Get it."

"i'm not going through your dresser!" Sans exclaimed, "no way!"

"Mettaton's right on the other side of that door!" Lucida cried, "I'm not doing it!"

"it's your dresser!" Sans retorted, "just do it!"

"Open up!" Mettaton shouted, growing angrier by the second.

"Augh!" Lucida groaned, "Why must everything be so complicated?!"

"do it!"

"No way! You do it!"

Suddenly, as if to end the conflict right then and there, a giant laser beam shot through both the dresser and the door just barely grazing by both Sans and Lucida. From the wreckage of the dresser fell the Mispersonification Ray.

"welp," Sans mused aloud, not daring to move, "that solves that problem."

Lucida was the first to move, snatching the Mispersonification Ray off the ground just before Mettaton clawed his way into the room, unfazed by the smoldering remains of the dresser he was crawling through. Sans then quickly found himself surrounded by mini-Mettatons yet again.

"You've irked me, Sans," Mettaton spat, "Now, you're going to pay."

"Here goes everything," Lucida said, readying the Ray. Sans silently willed her to hurry up.

"Say your prayers, irksome skeleton."

Lucida then leaped inbetween Mettaton and Sans, firing off a shot. The shot hit Mettaton in the chestplate, knocking him backward and causing the mini-Mettatons to disappear. The shot rebounded, though, scoring a direct hit on Sans and knocking him over as well. In an instant, he felt that same mind-scrambling sensation he felt the first time he'd been hit by the Ray. He then saw Mettaton get up, glaring daggers at him and Lucida before racing out of the room.

"What just-"

"LUCIDA," Sans said, speaking in uppercase once again, "IT DIDN'T LOOK LIKE HE WAS AFFECTED. WHY DIDN'T HE LOOK LIKE HE WAS AFFECTED?"

"Well," Lucida began hesitantly, "It's possible that his metal armor is protecting him from the ray...and is also responsible for reflecting the blast onto you."

"WE HAVE TO CATCH HIM!" Sans cried, not missing a beat as he raced after Mettaton. As he crawled through the remains of the dresser, his jacket caught fire, causing him to stop and throw the jacket off himself and onto the floor. After that, he stomped on the jacket to put out the flames, sighing in relief once he saw things were all clear.

"Smooth," Lucida joked, also crawling out.

"WHERE DID METTATON GO?" Sans asked quickly, kicking off his slippers and pulling off his socks.

"I don't know," Lucida replied, a hint of worry in her voice, "I didn't see which way he went."

"HE LOOKED SCARED," Sans noted, hoping that the look he saw on Mettaton's face after the ray was fired was actually fear.

"I think there is a way we can affect him," Lucida explained, "I think he knows that too. That's why he's running from us."

"HOW?"

"The heart on his belt that holds his soul. I think that's how we can affect him, but it has to be a pretty precise shot."

"ALL RIGHT, THEN," Sans said with a nod, "THAT'S HOW WE'LL DO IT."

"You...uh...want me to change you back to normal first?"

"NOT YET," Sans answered with a determined look, "THIS PERSONALITY GIVES ME THE KIND OF BOUNDLESS ENERGY I COULD ONLY DREAM OF NORMALLY. KNOWING HOW CRAZY THIS IS PROBABLY GONNA GET, I'M PROBABLY GONNA NEED IT."

* * *

"Why in the world would you keep the Mispersonification Ray after all the trouble it caused?!"

"It was an impulse move," Lucida answered Alphys sheepishly.

"An impulse move?!" Alphys repeated, "Lucida!"

"Hey!" Lucida retorted, "My "impulse move" is gonna end up saving our butts! Just you wait!"

Alphys sighed, massaging the bridge of her nose.

"After all this is over, that thing is gone," she groaned.

Sans exhaled slowly, leaning against Papyrus. He and Lucida had come back to the lounge to make sure the others were okay and fill them in on Lucida's plan. Because of the effects of the ray, Sans felt incredibly jittery, but he had to resist the urge to do anything crazy.

"You!"

Sans felt a chill rush down his spine. He whirled around to see Mettaton standing in the doorway to the lounge, his face contorted into an enraged scowl. His glare was directed straight at Sans.

"M-METTATON," Sans stuttered, his pupils disappearing in fear.

"STAY AWAY FROM SANS!" Papyrus warned, moving inbetween Sans and Mettaton, "THE GREAT PAPYRUS WON'T LET YOU HURT HIM!"

"You want to play that game with me, do you?" Mettaton spat, his expression unchanging, "I'll dust you too. It won't be that hard."

"LUCIDA!" Sans called, looking back to Lucida, "THE RAY!"

"R-right!" Lucida replied, readying the Ray. Mettaton saw this and let out a low growl, covering the heart on his belt with one hand.

"You really think that thing's going to stop me?" Mettaton said, directing his gaze toward Lucida, "If you can't hit my soul, that thing's worthless!"

Sans grimaced. Lucida also looked worried, the Ray shaking in her hands. It was clear that she wasn't prepared to deal with this situation.

Just then, a mess of vines shot up from the floor around Mettaton, pulling his hands away from his belt and leaving him wide open. Sans stared at the scene, gaping confusedly at what had just happened.

"Do it, Lucida!"

Sans froze upon hearing Flowey's voice. Before he could wonder any further, though, Lucida fired the Ray, scoring a direct hit on Mettaton's soul. Mettaton let out a bloodchilling scream before the vines let him go and he collapsed to the floor.

"WHAT JUST HAPPENED?" Sans asked, still frozen in place. He then felt another beam from the Ray hit him and his scrambled state of mind quickly returned to normal.

"We did it," Lucida said, coming up beside Sans. She then blew against the top of the Ray's barrel as if she were blowing away smoke from the barrel of a real gun.

"th-that was...what was that?" Sans stuttered, "what the heck just-"

"You're welcome."

Both Sans and Lucida turned to Flowey, who was currently crawling back into his flowerpot. He then gave both of them a look Sans couldn't quite decipher before clicking his tongue and turning away.

"Flowey," Lucida began, "You saved us."

"why, though?" Sans asked, pupils fading out once more, "i didn't think you cared."

"Normally, I wouldn't," Flowey replied.

"What's gotten into you, Flowey?" Lucida asked cheekily, almost as if she knew what was coming next.

"I don't know for sure," Flowey replied contemplatively, "but...I think I'm getting some of that Christmas spirit Lucida was talking about."

Lucida giggled ecstatically, clapping her hands and jumping up and down in place. Sans sighed.

"You? Christmas spirit?" Undyne piped up, "How is _that_ possible?

"All I know," Flowey said, looking like he had to force the words out of his mouth, "Is that no one should have to suffer on Christmas."

The entire room went silent for a good moment. Such a statement was so uncharacteristic of Flowey that it struck everyone speechless. Only Lucida didn't seem fazed. In fact, she seemed happier than ever.

"Ding, ding, ding!" Lucida exclaimed, "We have a winner!"

"What?" Flowey asked confusedly.

"I modified Mettaton to kidnap me to teach Flowey about Christmas spirit!"

"You what?!" Alphys exclaimed, "I-is that even possible?! Mettaton is a-!"

"You freaking _what_?!" Undyne roared, cutting Alphys off, "He literally almost killed people! What the heck did you think you were doing?!"

"I may have gone a bit too far..." Lucida replied sheepishly, her voice shaking, "but we're all okay, right? Everything's fine!"

"Hold on," Flowey butted in, "If you were trying to teach me about Christmas spirit, why didn't you have Mettaton come after me?"

"Well, we..."

Lucida froze and Sans could practically see the beads of sweat running down the side of her skull as she fished for an excuse.

"Well, that doesn't matter!" she finally finished, "Everyone is safe and Flowey learned about Christmas spirit!"

"AND NOW THAT THE DECORATING IS DONE," Papyrus continued, "WE CAN ALL CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS!"

Sans huffed, glaring at Lucida. Of course she was once again going to get off scot-free for everything she'd just done. It was getting to be pretty annoying.

"Ugh..."

Everyone then turned to where Mettaton was as the robot finally sat up.

"What happened?" Mettaton asked, looking around in complete bewilderment, "The last thing I remember is Lucida taking me back to her room with her..."

"Well..." Lucida started slowly, "You see, there's a pretty long story to all of that...

Lucida explained to Mettaton what had happened with only a few interjections from others to tell her how wrong she was to do what she did. Then, once both Mettaton and Lucida apologized for what they had done, there was a big celebration and that Christmas was the best Christmas any of them had ever celebrated. Enemies became friends, Flowey learned about Christmas spirit, and Lucida got a few more scares in on Undyne before the Christmas season came to an en-

"whoa whoa whoa," Sans interrupted, "hold up. that was the most anticlimactic ending in the history of ever. why does that warrant this whole sappy ending spiel that isn't even really true in the first place?"

"Who hired a narrator anyway?" Lucida asked.

Sans groaned, placing his head in his hands. After all of this, he was going to need a LOT of eggnog...

* * *

Sans lay awake in bed once again, staring up at the ceiling. Taking everything that had just happened that day into account, he should have passed out as soon as his head hit his pillow. Something was bugging him, though, and he knew he wasn't going to be able to sleep until he figured out what it was.

He sighed, getting out of bed and shoving his feet into his slippers. He then decided to teleport to the kitchen. He threw open the fridge, pulled out the near-empty carton of eggnog toward the back, and poured the rest of its contents into a glass. He took a single sip, then froze.

"i can teleport..."

He slammed the glass back down onto the counter, burying his face in his hands to try to keep from screaming with anger.

" _frickin' lucida._ "


End file.
